Season 5 Sweet Selah Moments Podcast, Sweet Selah Moments Podcast

A Boatload of Wisdom – Ephesians 4:17-32 – Episode 75

Season 5 Sweet Selah Moments Podcast
Season 5 Sweet Selah Moments Podcast
A Boatload of Wisdom - Ephesians 4:17-32 - Episode 75

Paul gives us many practical instructions at the end of Chapter 4 in Ephesians. Join Sharon and Nicole in studying these wonderful commands for our good and let’s learn together. Want to live wisely and well with no regrets? Here’s a boatload of wisdom to help you do just that.

Read the transcript for A Boatload of Wisdom Episode 75

Speaker 1 (00:03):

Is your world a little crazy and off kilter at the moment, feeling a bit frazzled? Well then, you’ve found the perfect place to regain some quiet today. Welcome to the Sweet Selah Moments Podcast, where we study his Word and encourage one another. The Sweet Selah Moment Podcast is a cooperative production of Word Radio and Sweet Selah Ministries.

Nicole (00:29):

Welcome to the Sweet Selah Moments Podcast. It’s so good to be back in the studio Sharon. I love having four beautiful girls but it’s a little rough when we all get sick one right after another.

Sharon (00:40):

Oh yes. I felt so badly for you.

Nicole (00:43):

Oh, it was a long stretch. Ah, so we are so sorry, listeners, for the extra pause in our podcast series. However, we hope episode 74 Becoming His was a huge blessing to you. Write us and let us know if you had heard that one before or if it was brand new to you. Today we’re back to studying Ephesians. It’s time for episode 75, A Boatload of Wisdom. Sharon, it seems like there is more advice than ever out there. And on every topic you can think of, some of it is wisdom and some of it we’d be better off ignoring

Sharon (01:13):

Isn’t that the truth?

Nicole (01:14):

Oh yes. We certainly need to be wise in who we ask for advice from and also on how we offer it. We don’t know how seriously someone might just take our advice (Sharon: Mmm-hmm) and we wanna make sure it’s not leading anyone down the wrong path, nor do we wanna be led astray by bad advice ourselves.

Sharon (01:30):

Good point.

Nicole (01:31):

Yeah. I like to try to find someone who’s living well the thing I need advice on, like an electrician friend to help change, you know, my vacuum cord that my puppy chewed on. My super fit friend for exercise tips. My God-following mom friends for parenting advice. I mean, no one is perfect, but it’s good to find someone who practices what they preach. Their life is proof of their sound advice.

Sharon (01:54):

What a great way to go about it, Nicole. I love that. Yeah.

Nicole (02:01):

So how about you, Sharon? Do you like giving and getting advice?

Sharon (02:04):

Well, it depends. But you know what? I gotta go back to what you said about like asking the electrician to give you advice in electricity, because that’s just so sensible. I remember when Ray and I were fairly newly married. We had two kids, so it wasn’t that new, I guess, seven years in, I could not keep a tidy house to save my life. I really couldn’t. It was so bad to the point that one day I was sitting in our living room and I was looking at a cobweb that was up in the, you know, corner of the room. (Nicole: Oh yes) And I’d seen it for like a month. And I said to myself, someone really needs to take care of that cobweb. And I thought, oh, oh, that someone would be me.

Nicole (02:47):

I suppose that’s me.

Sharon (02:49):

I dunno where I got this fancy idea that other people were going to take care of my cobwebs, right. So I finally knew I needed to reform and I did. I went to women who knew how to clean their houses. The ones that always seemed to be ahead of the game instead of wildly panicky picking up before company (Nicole: Right) and they looked at me blankly. I’m like, just tell me what you do.

Nicole (03:12):

What’s your secret?

Sharon (03:14):

And they did. And I wrote, I took notes. (Nicole: Yeah) And then I ended up with six things I would do every day.

Nicole (03:18):

Oh, perfect.

Sharon (03:19):

Because of them, because I had no clue. I just did not. (Nicole: You can’t know it all.) So anyways, yeah, so good advice about getting advice, by the way. (Nicole: Thank you) So about me. What do I think about advice? Well, as long as it’s not directed to me critically, like if people are mean, I don’t like it, but otherwise I actually do like it. Especially I treasure it when it’s by a Christ-follower, someone that knows the Lord and has lived it, like you said, living it out. So I tuck those nuggets away and they’re useful to me. I try to remember them. So I’m gonna share a few with you. I was thinking what was some of the best advice I’ve ever received. So one of the best was, turn your bitter thoughts (when I was really bitter about how little time Ray had for me) into prayer.

Nicole (04:05):

Yeah. That’s a really good one.

Sharon (04:06):

That was so good. And I needed it.

Nicole (04:07):

I use that a lot now. And it’s very helpful.

Sharon (04:09):

Turn your bitter thoughts into a prayer before they drown you in bitterness. So another one was from a pamphlet I read and it’s ‘don’t let the urgent keep you from what’s important’. Yeah. Because so often, you know, the next thing just keeps coming at you. And sometimes you have to say, no, it’s not as urgent as it’s making me think it is.

Nicole (04:28):

That’s very true.

Sharon (04:29):

I’m doing what’s important.

Nicole (04:30):

Oh, I like that one.

Sharon (04:31):

Yeah, I really love that one. Yeah. And then Fern Nichols taught me that when you’re criticized, the first thing you should do is say, thank you. (Nicole: Ooh) Which is so counter intuitive.

Nicole (04:41):

I never think of that first.

Sharon (04:42):

I’d never in 10,000 million years think of that, but it’s good. First of all, it throws the person off.

Nicole (04:49):

Like stop the criticism.

Sharon (04:50):

They’re like, whaaat? But also it gives you time to stop and, and realize, wow, I’m learning who you are by what you said. Or I’m learning something about me. Either way, thank you. I can learn from this. So. (Nicole: That’s good) Then, the Bible, a gentle answer turns away wrath. That one I memorized.

Nicole (05:08):

I say that all the time to my children. They’ve yet to believe me.

Sharon (05:11):

Yes. Yep. That’s another big one. And the last one I learned from Daniel Tiger.

Nicole (05:15):

Oh, he’s so wise.

Sharon (05:16):

I watched him one day with Mercedes when they were living with us. (Nicole: Oh) And he said when you’re angry countdown from five and he put his little hand up and you go 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. That’s really good. Even the hand motions that go with it.

Nicole (05:34):

Oh, we love Daniel Tiger. We learned many a life lessons from him.

Sharon (05:37):

Yes, yes, yes. So anyways, I often, however, want to give unsolicited advice and that doesn’t go as well. It’s really better to wait and be asked. And even then, like you said, I want to do the right advice. What would Jesus say? What does the Bible say? Really? That’s the most. Because you know, when a friend counsels me with advice, I can take it or leave it. Right. That’s my choice. When God counsels me through his word, it’s not really advice anymore.

Nicole (06:08):

That’s a good point.

Sharon (06:09):

It’s command; it’s instruction. It’s not just a good idea. It’s rich wisdom given to his children. So, we’re gonna look at his wisdom from God’s holy word today. These aren’t merely nice suggestions. These are core decisions we need to make based on God’s will for us.

Nicole (06:27):

Yes. I think that’s a great distinction between advice and wisdom, Sharon. That we can all give advice, good or bad, but true wisdom comes from God as he is the only true and unfailing source of absolute truth. So let’s go right to the source of the truth, the Bible.

Sharon (06:43):

Grand idea.

Nicole (06:44):

Can’t go wrong that way. Alright, I’ll start. We’re in Ephesians 4:17-22. I like the title that the NLT gives this section so I’ll read that first: Living as Children of Light. These really are instructions on how to live rightly. All right, verse 17, “With the Lord’s authority I say this. Live no longer as the Gentiles do for, they are hopelessly confused.”

Sharon (07:09):

“Their minds are full of darkness. They wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him.”

Nicole (07:20):

“They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasures and eagerly practice every kind of impurity.”

Sharon (07:26):

“But that isn’t what you learned about Christ.”

Nicole (07:29):

“Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him,”

Sharon (07:33):

“Throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception.”

Nicole (07:39):

“Instead, let the spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.”

Sharon (07:43):

“Put on your new nature created to be like God, truly righteous and holy.”

Nicole (07:49):

“So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth. For we are all part of the same body.”

Sharon (07:55):

(And don’t let sin, or excuse me) “Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry.”

Nicole (08:03):

“For anger gives a foothold to the devil.”

Sharon (08:05):

“If you are a thief, quit stealing.” (Isn’t he cute, this is so fun.)

Nicole (08:09):

I love that. Stop!

Sharon (08:10):

(Just stop it.) “Instead use your hands for good hard work, and then give generously to others in need.”

Nicole (08:18):

“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”

Sharon (08:26):

“And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit, by the way you live. Remember he has identified you as his own guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption.”

Nicole (08:38):

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander as well as all types of evil behavior.”

Sharon (08:45):

“Instead be kind to each other, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Well, that’s a boatload, right?

Nicole (08:56):

That’s a lot.

Sharon (08:57):

A boatload of wisdom. (Nicole: Yes) And commands and instructions that every single one, Nicole is for our good. I love that about God. He does this for our good, these are rules for living that are practical and worth studying. I divided them up, because there’s so many of them, into five sections. And we’re gonna look for practical ways to live these out. So would you introduce section one to us please?

Nicole (09:24):

Sure. All right. So I’m gonna read verses 17 through 24 and then skip to verse 30. So section one, Choose the Light. “With the Lord’s authority I say this. Live no longer as the Gentiles do for, they are hopelessly confused. Their minds are full of darkness. They wander far from the life God gives them because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity. But that isn’t what you learned about Christ. Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature created to be like God, truly righteous and holy.” Okay, and now for verse 30, which kind of finishes out the discussion by telling us why we should choose the light. “And do not bring sorrow to God’s oly Spirit, by the way you live. Remember he has identified you as his own guaranteeing that you’ll be saved on the day of redemption.”

Sharon (10:29):

I love verse 30, Nicole.

Nicole (10:30):

That’s beautiful.

Sharon (10:31):

It is. When we choose darkness, instead of light, we grieve God. We make him sad.

Nicole (10:37):

Oh, that’s hard to hear!

Sharon (10:38):

Isn’t it? I know it, it really is. We are his precious ones, saved and created to be righteous, holy. And when we go against his wisdom, it grieves him. He wants better for us. We’re his kids. He wants us happy. (Nicole: Yeah) And we’re not happy when we’re doing bad, silly, stupid things.

Nicole (10:56):


Sharon (10:57):


Nicole (10:57):

And hopelessly confused. He doesn’t want us living that way.

Sharon (11:00):

No. And with a hardened heart, because then he can’t work through us. So, so, oh my goodness. That’s like the biggest reason to choose light. (Nicole: Mm-hmm) So, I bet you can relate as a parent, when you advise your girls to do something the right way and they don’t or when you command the girls. How do you feel?

Nicole (11:19):

I think that might be one of the hardest parts of parenting for me, Sharon. (Sharon: Yeah). You know, to watch my girls suffer as a result of choosing the wrong thing after so carefully trying to show them the right way.

Sharon (11:29):


Nicole (11:29):

You know, the outright choices for wrong or the complete ignoring of the good advice. It’s tough to witness.

Sharon (11:34):

It is. It is. And a lot of us learn lessons the hard way. I have, and my kids did. I can remember saying, don’t you think you should start your homework, you know? And then they’re pulling an all nighter because the science fair project is due tomorrow. And I’m usually up there with them helping them, or I was. I mean, it’s been a long time. So somehow though, thinking this makes God sad, (Nicole: Mm-hmm) it makes my parent God sad. It helps me to do better.

Nicole (12:00):

Mm, that’s a good point. So when I was a kid, thinking I would hurt my parents or disappoint them was way worse than just making them mad.

Sharon (12:09):

It was, you don’t wanna disappoint your parents.

Nicole (12:10):

Yeah. So thinking about that in a way with God, I feel that more strongly than, oh, I might make him mad. So I’ll just try to sneak and not get caught. But if you think you’re gonna grieve them, it makes it like, oh, I don’t wanna make him sad. I don’t wanna grieve my parents, you know?

Sharon (12:22):

Right, right. Yeah.

Nicole (12:24):

So I don’t know. I can imagine that, you know, how we feel, you know, the broken-heartedness of seeing our kids choose wrong, God feels that so much more. Cause he’s God, you know?

Sharon (12:32):

Yes, he is. He is.

Nicole (12:33):

He sees so much more of a bigger picture, you know, than I see from my own daughter’s lives. So he sees all of his children’s lives, all together, all over the ages. So he can see how our actions affect eternity.

Sharon (12:45):

Oh, man, that’s a word. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Nicole (12:49):

So, you know, in light of all that, I really like to remember, you know, I like the reminder we have in verse 22, “Throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception,” by doing this, we will behave differently. And that will get the attention of those around us who are hopelessly confused.

Sharon (13:06):

Yes. It will.

Nicole (13:07):

And lost without Jesus. Like we were before he changed our hearts.

Sharon (13:11):

I love that. And I like verse 23 too, because you’ve got that throw off part. (Nicole: Yeah) And then what do you now replace it with? Right? So instead let the spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. So, okay. So first I’m like no, old nature, not going there, not being bitter, you know? So Lord renew me, give me new thoughts and attitudes. (Nicole: Yeah) It’s so easy to slip into old ways of behavior, right?

Nicole (13:38):

It is. Yep.

Sharon (13:39):

We’ve already worn that groove and instead we need renewals. So we pray. (Nicole: Yes) God will renew us, make us new, wash us clean. We get a do over. And that’s what I love about God. He gives us a do over.

Nicole (13:52):

Oh, we need so many of them.

Sharon (13:56):

Yes. And that’s where the work has to begin. Before I can be consistently nice on the outside my insides have to get right. I have to renew my thoughts and then my actions will follow. So, so now the next few sections talk about the specifics. First we have to throw off what’s bad. Now we renew; we’ve chosen the light. So section two, our next section is pretty short and to the point but now we’re getting super practical. So section two is called, Be a Truth Teller. Verse 25. “So stop telling lies.”

Nicole (14:31):

Direct and to the point. Stop.

Sharon (14:34):

“Let us tell our neighbors the truth for we are all parts of the same body.” You know, I think it’s interesting that one of the reasons we are to tell the truth is that we’re all parts of the same body. (Nicole: Yeah) Lies don’t just affect one person.

Nicole (14:48):


Sharon (14:48):

It’s a whole web of people that get affected when we lie, we affect others when we sin. They’re almost always discovered, lies are.

Nicole (14:56):

Oh, yes. Yeah.

Sharon (14:57):

And if not, we are in a dark place trying to hide them and we’re not living as children of the light. (Nicole: Mm-hmm) We’ve created a dark corner and we have to always think about, oh, what did I tell them? (Nicole: Yeah, it’s terrible to live that way) You know? So there’s no freedom in that. It’s terrible. (Nicole: Yeah) This one also shows up in the big Ten Commandments too. So God’s pretty clear about it. We are not to lie.

Nicole (15:16):


Sharon (15:17):

And you know what, Nicole, sometimes it’s really tempting to lie. I have to confess to you. We call it by other names. We call it fudging the truth or, stretching it a little bit, you know? Or here’s one where I am so guilty. When I tell a story, I conveniently leave out the parts that might make me look bad. (Nicole: Ooh) Right. I tell it in a way that I come across, perhaps a little more hero-like than I should. And that’s deception. That’s wrong. I need to tell the truth.

Nicole (15:49):

I know that’s so hard isn’t it?

Sharon (15:52):

Owies, owies.

Nicole (15:52):

Yeah. That exaggerating? I, exaggeration is kind of a form of lying for me personally, that I struggle with, you know, like fluffing up my story to sound more exciting. (Sharon: Yeah, yeah) That’s something I really have to be on guard for cause it’s fun to tell an exciting story about yourself or something else and it’s still lying.

Sharon (16:06):

Yes. It is.

Nicole (16:07):

Or that white lie? I hate that. Cause no lie is white. It’s all entrapping.

Sharon (16:09):

I know it. Exactly so, it really is.

Nicole (16:11):

It’s terrible.

Sharon (16:12):

I agree. I agree. Yeah. Sometimes there’s hyperbole. Like if I say to you, I have a zillion errands to run today. No one’s going to believe me with that. There’s some wiggle room there

Nicole (16:23):

Sharon you’re lying to us – ha ha!

Sharon (16:27):

If I say I have twelve errands to do today and I have three that’s a lie.

Nicole (16:31):


Sharon (16:31):

Right. So I think hyperbole is okay, cause it’s just funny. And nobody seriously thinks you’re doing a zillion. So but, anyways, we need to be truth tellers.

Nicole (16:42):


Sharon (16:42):

Even when it makes us look bad, (Nicole: Mm-hmm) especially then.

Nicole (16:46):

I know.

Sharon (16:47):

Because, hey, we are bad and we’re happily saved by Jesus. (Nicole: Yeah) So the hero is him, not us.

Nicole (16:54):


Sharon (16:54):


Nicole (16:54):

Well, and if we confess our sin, we almost look better than trying to lie and cover it up.

Sharon (16:59):

No kidding.

Nicole (17:00):

Like I tell that with my girls, like, they’ll come up to me and they’ll try to make these excuses and lie and I’m like girls, like I’m not gonna be upset with you if you come and tell me what you did wrong.

Sharon (17:07):


Nicole (17:07):

I’ll forgive you and move on. But if you lie to me, (Sharon: Mm-hmm) you will have a consequence. Lying always has a consequence and we say Olstad girls do not lie. Like that’s our big thing.

Sharon (17:16):


Nicole (17:16):

God hates lying lips. It’s a 10, that’s a big one.

Sharon (17:19):

It is a big one.

Nicole (17:20):

And it’s so easy to do.

Sharon (17:21):

It is because we want to look good.

Nicole (17:24):

Yes. So we try so hard to, to work on lying.

Sharon (17:27):

Yeah. I love that.

Nicole (17:27):

You know, but, it keeps me honest cause they are watching me.

Sharon (17:30):

Oh yeah.

Nicole (17:30):

So is mommy being honest about everything?

Sharon (17:33):


Nicole (17:33):

Oh, it’s tough being a parent.

Sharon (17:35):

It is, it is. And the older they get the wiser they get about that.

Nicole (17:38):

They catch everything.

Sharon (17:39):

Yeah. You’re like, wow. Just go back to being little, would you?

Nicole (17:45):

Yeah. So it’s good. You know?

Sharon (17:46):

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. So.

Nicole (17:48):

Well to follow that, our next section is called To Be Self-Controlled.

Sharon (17:52):

Well, okay.

Nicole (17:53):

So working on not lying. This is from verses 26 and 27 and also from verse 31, Paul really hammers down on not being an angry person.

Sharon (18:03):


Nicole (18:04):

So section three, “Be Self-Controlled and don’t sin by the letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry for anger gives a foothold to the devil.” And verse 31 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander as well as all types of evil behavior.” So anger. Hmm. This one can get ugly pretty fast.

Sharon (18:29):

Yes, it can.

Nicole (18:29):

You know, of all the emotions, this one can really lead to sudden and very regrettable actions.

Sharon (18:35):


Nicole (18:36):

I think that’s why God warns so seriously not to let anger control us. Many of the other emotions don’t seem to escalate quite so rapidly.

Sharon (18:43):

That’s true.

Nicole (18:44):

And possibly lead to, you know, explosive, irrational decisions. (Sharon: Mm-hmm) Or on the other end, anger can be this hot, low burn and it can give the devil a foothold and start to fester in our lives.

Sharon (18:55):


Nicole (18:56):

And what do I mean by foothold? That’s kind of an old Christian term too. I picture the door of our heart, you know, we talked about this in a previous episode. You know?

Sharon (19:03):

Okay. Yeah.

Nicole (19:04):

And that we open it to Jesus when he knocks and the devil’s trying to get in there too. And to me, a foothold is like, he’s got his big, hairy toe in the door crack and he’s trying to force his way in. (Sharon: Uhhuh) And just a little is all it takes to solely inch that door open and open and it lets in a world of sorrow and pain from uncontrolled anger.

Sharon (19:22):

Yeah. And it’s that uncontrolled anger, which is why we have to practice self control. Rage is when you’re not even in control of yourself anymore.

Nicole (19:31):

There’s no logic in it.

Sharon (19:32):

No. And there’s hurtful words and high blood pressure and all kinds of bad things happen. Right.

Nicole (19:38):

Yeah. It can be pretty scary.

Sharon (19:39):

It can be very scary to be out of control like that. And that’s not what God wants for us.

Nicole (19:43):

No, no.

Sharon (19:44):

Yeah. Also I love that image of a big hairy toe. I’m like, oh that is so–wow. That’s really good.

Nicole (19:52):

Some pastor back in my youth said that. I will never forget Satan’s big hairy toe–

Sharon (19:56):

Trying to get the door! That’s right.

Nicole (19:58):

I’m like eew!

Sharon (19:58):

Get out. I know. That’s exactly the response.

Nicole (20:02):

You should be repulsed.

Sharon (20:04):

In my mind, I’m shoving the door shut.

Nicole (20:06):


Sharon (20:07):

No, I will not give way to rage. Lord Jesus, help me to have self-control.

Nicole (20:11):

Yes, absolutely.

Sharon (20:13):

Wow. Okay. So, so far we’ve learned we are to choose the light. (Nicole: Yes) And it starts with our heart and our inner attitude. Number two, we’re told to be truth tellers, three, we’ve gotta be self-controlled, which again is a reliance on the Holy Spirit. Well, section four is all about how we handle money and possessions. And so I called it Handle Money and Possessions with Integrity.

Nicole (20:36):

Hmm. I like that.

Sharon (20:37):

That’s kind of a long name, but that’s what I came up with. All right. So, and it’s just from verse 28. So this is the one we giggled at. “If you are a thief, quit stealing.” It’s just like, okay, can we just be clear here? We’re not being subtle. Stop it.

Nicole (20:51):

Right, right.

Sharon (20:53):

“Instead use your hands for good hard work and then give generously to others in need.” So here’s another Ten Commandment reiterated. (Nicole: Yeah) Don’t steal. We’re to work hard. And I love how he says, use your hands, get ’em dirty if you have to.

Nicole (21:08):

It gives you a good option, instead of stealing, use your hands for good.

Sharon (21:11):

Right. Exactly so, and you know, manual labor’s fine. Do it. (Nicole: Yep) Just get to work. And when we work hard, I love that it’s to give generously to others in need. It’s not to accumulate. It’s not to be greedy. I remember I was gonna ask Ray and I forgot, some rich man a long time ago was asked, well how much money do you need? And his answer was so sad to me, Nicole. It was, always a little more, (Nicole: Oh) like never satisfied.

Nicole (21:41):

That you have a yearning for that.

Sharon (21:41):

Accumulate and accumulate and accumulate? You’re never done. What a horrible almost addictive way to live. Right?

Nicole (21:50):

You’ll never enjoy what you have.

Sharon (21:51):

Yeah. Well, nope. We’re not allowed to do that. If we are accumulating it’s to give, (Nicole: Oh) we are to give generously.

Nicole (21:57):

I like that.

Sharon (21:58):

So stop stealing. Stop accumulating.

Nicole (22:01):

Work with your hands mm hmm.

Sharon (22:02):

Just give. So how are you teaching this money lesson to your kids? I figure you’ve told them not to steal. That’s pretty basic.

Nicole (22:10):

Yes. That’s one of the other Olstad rules, do not steal. They come up, I found this in the –and no, you can’t steal that.

Sharon (22:16):

No, put it back. Put it back. Yes.

Nicole (22:17):

So we’re not great with allowances and giving them cash. But we do have, we do button systems and they use buttons to earn things.

Sharon (22:26):

Oh, that’s fun.

Nicole (22:26):

So they don’t have a lot of cash and they use that when I take them to the store. But when they do have money, we always talk about giving the ten percent to God.

Sharon (22:33):


Nicole (22:33):

They tithe at church and our children’s ministry is so good about making sure they do have like a tithing time in the children’s church.

Sharon (22:40):

I love that.

Nicole (22:41):

Yeah. Sometimes you don’t think about that, but they’re able to, oh, make sure you have your tithe money. We’re giving this to God because God gave us this, you know?

Sharon (22:47):


Nicole (22:48):

That little reminder’s good. And then, you know, good old Veggie Tales. We quote this a lot. If we have two to spare, then you have one to share.

Sharon (22:56):

I love that.

Nicole (22:56):

That’s perfect.

Sharon (22:57):

Daniel Tiger. VeggieTales. We are simple women.

Nicole (23:00):

We are. The wisdom of children resonates so well in my heart. But it’s a simple way to truly evaluate what we have and what we actually need, and then what we can give, you know?,

Sharon (23:10):


Nicole (23:11):

So, it’s just, it’s a way for us to look at what God had. Like God has blessed us so much. So we’re able to give to others because he’s blessed us.

Sharon (23:17):

Yes, exactly so, and you know what, there’s joy in giving, isn’t there?

Nicole (23:22):

Yes, it’s so fun.

Sharon (23:22):

Yes it is. And I think your kids are learning that. I love that.

Nicole (23:25):

I hope so. So now we’re at section five, Use Words to Help and Heal. This is our last section and it’s got a lot in it. I’m reading verses 29 and 32 to finish out our boatload of lessons today. “So don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say, be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. Instead be kind to each other, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

Sharon (23:56):


Nicole (23:57):

So looking at verse 29, I definitely want my words to do what it says at the end, but it’s hard to let everything you say, be good and helpful.

Sharon (24:05):

No kidding. That’s a filter. Isn’t it?

Nicole (24:07):

That’s huge.

Sharon (24:08):


Nicole (24:09):

I think, you know, that would probably change about 70% of what I say in a day. (Sharon: Yes) If I only ask those two questions first, is it good? Is it helpful? (Sharon: Mm-hmm) Wow. That would make a huge difference in what flies out of my mouth at times. Something to work on for sure. And goodness, don’t use foul or abusive language. It’s not needed or useful.

Sharon (24:31):


Nicole (24:31):

Ever. It just hurts. And it makes us look rotten going around, abusing people with our words.

Sharon (24:35):

It does. We are the ones that look bad.

Nicole (24:37):

It’s true. It never makes us look better, ever.

Sharon (24:39):

No, mm-hmm

Nicole (24:40):

So we have to remember the power in what comes out of our mouths and oh, I’m so thankful for the heart in the next verse.

Sharon (24:47):


Nicole (24:48):

Sharon, what do you see there that can cover any foul or abusive language that may come out of our mouth to those around us?

Sharon (24:54):

Oh my goodness. Well, let me read it and then we’ll talk, cause sometimes we do need to ask forgiveness when our words are not kind.

Nicole (25:01):

When we don’t filter well.

Sharon (25:01):

Yeah. And again, we’ve got do that instead of this, do that and here it is in verse 32. “Instead be kind to each other.” “Tender hearted.” Don’t get a hard heart. “Forgiving one another just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Oh my goodness. Forgiveness is so important. Over and over and over, God wants us to forgive. And, it really helped me when I understood what forgiveness meant. (Nicole: Yeah) That it’s a Greek word, aphiemi, I could be saying it totally wrong. I have absolutely no Greek in my background except to read a word in a book. But it means, let it go, let it go. It’s when we hold onto grudges that our heart hardens we become bitter and our desire to see someone else hurt badly cuz of what they did to us grows in us. Right. Forgiveness never means what you did was fine. It was okay. (Nicole: Right) The mere act of forgiving says what you did was wrong or there wouldn’t be a need of forgiveness.

Nicole (26:06):


Sharon (26:06):

So it’s actually declaring what they did was sin. But it says, I am letting go of my desire to pound your face into the ground. And instead I’m trusting God to deal with you and he will, so please repent. (Nicole: Right) Or you’re in deep trouble. You really are. So, we need to forgive. We absolutely need to forgive. So.

Nicole (26:29):

Oh, that’s a good verse.

Sharon (26:30):

Yeah, it is. It’s so good. These are memorizing verses, right?

Nicole (26:33):


Sharon (26:34):

So that they come to our attention when we need them.

Nicole (26:36):


Sharon (26:37):

So that was a boat load of wisdom today. I mean, it really was. We could go over and over it. It’s kind of like when Jesus had the fishermen cast their nets one more time and wham the boat was so full it almost sunk. I feel like I’ve been loaded full (Nicole: Yeah!) with a fish-full of wisdom. So let’s review, one more time, sort of the five main life lessons out of this. One was Choose the Light. Two, be a Truth Teller. Three, Be Self-controlled. Four, Handle Money and Possessions with Integrity, and five, Use Words to Help and Heal. This is the way we’re supposed to live. And the reason is this will bless others and bless us.

Nicole (27:21):


Sharon (27:21):

And if we don’t it grieves the Holy Spirit, because we’re less than what he created us to be. (Nicole: Right) So let’s pray.

Nicole (27:28):


Sharon (27:30):

Oh heavenly Father. I thank you for the wisdom in your word. We receive this instruction, Lord. It’s clear. Don’t lie. Don’t steal. We can’t ignore it because of its clarity, help us to obey, help us to run to you swiftly and ask for forgiveness when we need to, to always come into the light and thank you for instructions on how to live that bring joy to us and joy to others. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Nicole (28:02):

Amen. We’ve turned a corner in Ephesians, moving from theology to more practical instructions on how to live out the theology. The rest of this book continues with incredibly relevant and helpful instructions on how to live wisely in dark times. We are so excited to unpack this with you section by section. We’d love to hear how God is speaking to you through the book of Ephesians. So would you write us and let it us know. You can reach us by going to If you’d like to help us out financially, we’d be so grateful. Go to And please know that always we pray that these podcasts help you grow closer to the Lord, shining your own light brightly. Come back next week for episode 70, Live a Life of Love. Have a great week.

Speaker 1 (28:49):

We are so glad you stopped for a while with us. The Sweet Selah Moments Podcast is a cooperative production of Word, Radio and Sweet Selah Ministries. More information about this podcast can be found at Thank you for joining us.

You can download and print the transcript here.

2 Comments. Leave new

  • Sharon and Nicole,
    Thank you for sharing these important and relevant truths from Ephesians. I appreciate your transparency in sharing your life experiences, too! Sharon, I still value the book you once gifted us in MIP, “The Tyranny of the Urgent,”, something I must contend with regularly. I look forward to the next podcast!

    • Sharon Gamble
      May 2, 2022 7:24 pm

      Lori, that little book changed how I viewed my life and what I let “rule” it. SO glad you are still using it, too. Glad you enjoyed the podcast, friend. It’s SO encouraging to get feedback. Thank you.


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